Applications

If it seems like I've dropped off the end of the earth, never to be seen again, I have. I'm currently dwelling in the limbo of grad-school application madness. I am consumed by my application essay (which I must create 11 different drafts of - one for each school). It is supposed to be a statement of purpose describing why I want to study philosophy, what preparation I have had for this (none), why I want to study at each specific school, and perhaps what I intend to do with my degree. Trying to write it is unpleasant, but at least it did spawn this much more true-to-me and quite accurate account, which I will not send to a single place I am applying. This is for those of you who want to know the real reason I'm applying to graduate schools in philosophy:

I plaster myself to windows in the winter when it snows, transfixed by the falling lightness. A snowflake weighs .000001 gram. But they can fall by the millions, and they do. It takes time, though - the slow and steady buildup of lightness that lends itself to heaviness when taken as a whole. Time is the master-builder.

In time, snow seeps into the gritty winter earth, providing groundwater for spring. The bursting forth of spring has its foundation in the winter's steady snow.

I see in snowflakes the pattern of my thoughts. I pride myself on my rationality and my painstaking analysis of life, events, and relationships - it is my source of sanity. But there are times when certainty wells up slowly from within me, rather than being motivated by a single external stimulus or event. Thoughts, feelings, and desires fall into place like snowflakes, and gather themselves into a purpose.

The philosophy of religion class I took in my junior year of college revolutionized my view of schoolwork. I couldn't get back to my dorm room fast enough to plunge into the works of great thinkers, pick them apart, shove the pieces under the microscope, and then write about what I saw. Never did I gain such pleasure from my science labs. No other subject so incited me to initiate riotous dinner conversations with my friends. But, it was spring of my junior year, and changing majors then would have resulted in an undergraduate career of more than four years. My pride would not allow that, and neither would my scholarship. So I dropped the idea of pursuing philosophy. Not enough snow had fallen.

My senior year, I filled an open slot in my schedule with an introduction to philosophy course - to get an overview. I figured it couldn't hurt. More snow fell.

The deepest snowfall has been in my previous year teaching environmental education to 3-5 year olds. Any mother knows that the moments of greatest clarity and decision in life often come when faced with small screaming children. All levity aside, my desire to pursue a graduate degree in philosophy is deeply tied to my drive to teach.

A true teacher does not inundate students with facts, figures, theories and formulas. Rather, she aides in opening the mind, equipping the student with tools to make sense of his/her world and experience - the tools that allow him/her to solve problems and arrive at inventive solutions. The most important skills a student can develop are the capacity for reason and the ability to communicate effectively.

Philosophy focuses on just these skills. It provides a synthesis of all of the seemingly fragmented disciplines, because it gets to the heart of the question - mankind's struggle to understand the world. By teaching philosophy, I would enable students to further develop their capacity to question deeply, analyze thoroughly, spot flaws in arguments, and write in a decisive, lucid, and convincing manner.

Scheming Standardized Test-Making Nazis and Evil Capitalistic Programmer Pigs Convene

Thus making my life miserable. ETS charges you $15 for each school you want to send your GRE scores to. I'm applying to 11 places. It stinks. Also today, my hotmail account decided to randomly delete my messages from the last 3 months, many of which were important, leaving intact all of the useless mail that has been sitting in my box for years (literally).

Cake and Costumes

October is always a fun time for me. I can't argue with a month that has both my birthday and Halloween in it. For my birthday, we went to Bennigans, went out dancing, and had a celebration with Frank's dad and Annett. Frank bought me the first birthday cake I've had in almost five years, which was sweet of him. It also had roses on it and was yummy. Can't ask for more than that. :-)

For Halloween, I wanted to dress up and go to costume dances. Fortunately, Frank was willing to oblige and chose Zorro and "his girl" from the list of potential costume options I had made up. Frank looked great, and I loved the way he used his cape as a prop while dancing. We both had fun getting into character. I half expected that we would inadvertently cause some poor older lady or gentleman to have a heart attack with the way we were dancing, but no-one keeled over. They actually complimented us. Never underestimate an 89-year-old who can dance the tango.

General Updates

I'm publishing many entries all at once to make up for my general lack of records (not that anyone's reading anyhow ;-)) So, the news - I'm applying to 11 different graduate programs in philosophy. 9 are masters programs with 2 doctoral programs as my long shots. I took the GRE and I'm working on the applications. I'm still working at the private school near Chicago, which is going well. Another ongoing thing is that Frank and I are hoping to enter a ballroom dancing competition in May.

London

Bridge is not falling down. Fortunately. Especially since we drove on it. England is definitely one of the places I would like to re-visit.

The traffic was crazy and I would prefer to explore it by foot, but it was wonderful of Nana to take us around in her van. Nana was an exchange student (from Japan) we had when I was in first grade who now lives in London. She is now a mother and her husband Chris was kind enough to watch the little one while she showed us around for two days. We went saw many of the traditional sights - Big Ben, the bridge, the parliament building, and also went to see Anthony and Cleopatra at the Globe theatre. Michelle and I got standing room tickets and were so close we could lean on the stage. When the servant committed suicide in the play, we go splashed with blood. It was exciting, and well worth standing for 3 hours. Mom, Michelle, and I stayed at a hotel that was really more like a backpackers - totally bare-bones furnishing and no phone in the room. Still, it was worth it.


We went to Stratford Upon Avon to see Shakespear's birthplace, which was also neat. They charged an excessively unreasonable amount to go inside the house, so we just looked from the outside. It seemed too touristy of an idea to me, but Mom and Michelle wanted to check out the gift shop, so I went in too. I got a collection of sayings/poems on love by Shakespear, but the item I found most amusing was an eraser with the saying "Out, out, damn spot" on it. Gotta love McBeth.


We also went to visit Warwick castle, which was over-the-top touristy, but had some interesting exhibits and shows, and the jousting was fun to watch. I can never complain about watching knights ride around on beautiful horses.

Gibraltar

It is embarrassing how long it is taking me to finish this trip record. I need to be better about this. Sigh.

Anyhow, our last stop was Gibraltar, and the most fascinating parts to me were the monkeys and the view of Africa (Morocco, to be exact). Gibraltar has been strategically important in a military sense because of its location at the mouth of the Mediterranean, so it has an interesting history, which I have largely forgotten. It probably would have bored most of you anyway. To put it shortly, it has been occupied by many different cultures/countries over the years. It was the Moors (Arabs) who brought the monkeys over.

It was awesome to see Africa, it made me want to go there. I think I'm most interested in the Middle-eastern countries because the culture and the history fascinates me. It doesn't seem like the best area to visit right now, though. Maybe some day that will change.

So, about the monkeys. They are technically "wild," in that they don't belong to anyone, but they are incredibly tame around people. Why? Because tourists feed them. And if you don't feed them, they take your food. I watched them steal a candy bar from a teenage boy who ignored our tour guides warning not to carry anything in a plastic bag that rustled (the monkeys tore it out of his hands). My cousins saw a monkey climb up a little girl, grab her ice cream cone, and run off with it. Talk about taking any means to get your sugar fix.